Who remembers that 2015 song “I’m a classy man” by the handsome Nigerian-American rapper Jidenna? The hook of the song goes thus: “I’m a classic man…you can be mean when you look this clean, I’m a classic man”. As a Researcher and Writer, I get to search for and read lots of stuffs; formal and informal in books and on the internet – and this morning while surfing the internet, I stumbled on a 2016 article written by one Mr. Kobi, a Fashion and Style Consultant. The piece is about the qualities of a classy man and he outlined thirteen (13) qualities to note. It is from this that I presently share my own thoughts on the qualities of a classy man, following the 13 qualities Mr. Kobi listed.
Do you want you be a classy man? This article takes you on an adventurous but smooth journey on the qualities of a classy man as different from being a “classic” man. Note that the thirteen qualities are as listed by Mr. Kobi but explained by me per my own unique experiences.
1. The classy man has a high amount of confidence.
Being a classy man does not only start and end with one’s dress sense, as many are wont to think. Being classy involves many other ingredients much more important than mere dressing up and one of such is confidence. A classy man is that man who is confident in himself and his abilities, even in the face of insecurities, fear and doubts. A classy man is the man who walks into any room with his head held high and looks everyone in the eye with a composure that says “I am in charge of my life’ even when he does not have everything going for him. Being confident is not the same as being proud – and we know what they say: it is not bragging or pride if you can back it up. So for you to be a classy man, you have to have a high amount of confidence in not only how you look and dress but also in yourself per your intellect, character, etiquettes, abilities and capacities.
2. The classy man has a unique personal style and understands the fashion and style rules.
This is very crucial to becoming a classy man as it is borne out of confidence in oneself. A classy man, having a high confidence in himself, does not go with the crowd in everything and certainly not with his dressing. As opposed to others who are afraid to stand on their own, the classy man knows that style is personal and so he wears only clothes that accentuates his body frame and fits his personal style, as opposed to following the trend. Added to this is the advantage of deep understanding of the fashion and style rules. For example, a classy man knows that he cannot wear a stripped shirt with a stripped necktie or wear a brown belt with a black shoe (particularly when his shirt is tucked in). A classy man knows, understands and adheres to the fashion and style rules while also maintaining his own peculiar and unique style.
3. The classy man knows he must not break the bank to look good and be stylish.
Many men believe that to be classy, one has to wear the top designer brands in the market. For this group of men, being classy is synonymous to being a rich or wealthy fella. This is far from the reality. While being rich helps to make one classy, it is not a prerequisite to being classy. Although it is good to own and wear quality clothes made by famous designers such as Gucci, Klein, Police, Hilfiger, Boss and others, a classy man knows that expensive is not synonymous to classy because one can own designer clothes but may not know how to match and/or wear them per fashion and style rules. The classy man knows how to get his clothes at prices that do not necessarily have him breaking the bank to look great. The classy man knows that being a classy man is more about knowing what to buy, where to buy them at a reasonable price and how to match them and less about the brand names on them.
4. The classy man has a very good relationship with his tailor.
The man who wants to be classy must have a good tailor but it doesn’t stop there: he must share a good relationship with him – or her. Having a good tailor and sharing a good relationship with him (or her; since some females make male clothes and they are very good at it) is key to becoming a classy man. This is very important because a good tailor is one who knows what you want, your body and goes all out to fix it for you, and also helps one in making bespoke shirts, pants and suits. A good tailor also gives you suggestions about recent fashion and style that makes for classy dressing. If you do not already have a good relationship with a good tailor, your journey to becoming a classy man has not yet began.
5. The classy man only drinks socially and doesn’t smoke to impress anyone.
While drinking and smoking are habits that medical practice have said is dangerous to health, there is an understanding that drinking socially, which is occasionally, is okay just as it is with smoking. A classy man is that man who does not binge daily on alcohol because he understands that it is harmful to his health and general wellbeing. So for the classy man, he only drinks socially typically at weekends when he is hanging out with the boys or during a club night, wedding or birth day party. And in these social gatherings, just as when he is at home or in a private place, he doesn’t drink to stupor but drinks mildly. The classy man may smoke occasionally but does so only because he wants to and not for the purpose of impressing anyone or to feel among in any gathering. With drinking and smoking, the classy man doesn’t engage in them to please and/or impress others.
6. The classy man is mindful of where he hangs out.
Anything that is not scarce sooner rather than later loses value and the classy man knows this. The classy man does not go everywhere, even when invited – because he understands that where he hangs out has impacts on his personality and world view. Although he is not a man who discriminates and looks down on others, the classy man does not sit for a drink just about anywhere. He likes to hang out at bars, restaurants, clubs, sports centers, etc where there are people like him because he understands the power of influence. Being a classy man comes with knowing that while one should be friendly to people, one do not have to hang out in just about any place with anyone; particularly a place that does not speak well of those seen there. A classy man would not be seen hanging out at a place where illicit drugs are being sold and/or consumed.
7. The classy man doesn’t fight.
Real men do not have to fight to prove themselves – and a classy man understands this. Whenever provoked or spoiled for a fight by another, the classy man does not oblige such invitation because he knows that his strength is not to be expressed or displayed through fighting. But in the event that he is provoked by anyone, the classy man does one or both of the following: take a walk from the scene or invites the local police to arrest the fellow (in situations that he wants to seek redress/justice). Only small men fight in public and classy men are not small men.
8. A classy man attracts the attention of many women but only has eyes for his lady.
A man who possesses the above seven (7) qualities would definitely be an attraction to many women and they would do their best to make him go on a date with them. But while he revels in the attraction he gets from women, the classy man is not randy nor is he a womanizer – so he sticks to only one woman; his girlfriend or wife. Any man who finds fulfillment in dating and having sex with numerous women cannot be described as a classy man.
9. A classy man respects everyone.
It has been argued and agreed that one of the ways to identify a man that has been properly raised is how he treats others, particularly those who are below his socioeconomic status. A classy man is that man who respects everyone no matter their station in life; not minding that he is older, richer, finer or sophisticated than them. Being respectful is important because a classy man knows that respect is reciprocal. After all it has been said that respect is not enforced but earned. To become a classy man in deed, you have to respect people everywhere you find yourself as it is the first sign that you are a gentleman – and to be a classy man, you have to first become a gentleman.
10. A classy man never brags about his accomplishments and never whines about his problems.
Pride goes before a fall – and a classy man knows this. A classy man does not go out on a date with a lady and continues to talk about his achievements and accomplishments. “I have a house in London and another in Seychelles”, “I own luxury wristwatches and necklaces”, “I am the first to drive a Benz in my village”, “I graduated with a first class from Harvard University”, etc. No, bro! A classy man won’t reel out his accomplishments to a woman he is interested it but allows her find out herself – and this makes her respect him. On the other side of this is the reality that the classy man does not whine and complain about the potpourri of challenges and problems he is battling with. A classy man stays calm in the midst of the storm while working to find solutions to his problems, however daunting and many they are.
11. A classy man is well educated, well read and speaks properly.
Education makes room for a man and to be a classy man, one has to be well educated, well read and speak properly. Speaking properly means not speaking hurriedly even as one does not say everything that comes to mind, particularly when in public. The classy man, however busy he is, takes some hours off to read at least a book about things he was not taught in school because he understands that education is beyond one’s course of study and/or profession. The classy man is well educated because he reads about other cultures and civilizations, attend educational conferences and travel to new cities where he become friends with people who help him better understand the world and things around him. The classy man regularly listens to the news and current affairs so he is one who is up to speed with both local and international affairs. The classy man knows about the world around him – and that afar.
12. A classy man maintains good hygiene.
A classy man keeps all parts of his external body clean and healthy. This means that a classy man does not wear dirty clothes nor keep dirty and unkempt hairs on his body, beards and head. While belonging to the “beard gang” is the norm these days, a classy man keeps well trimmed and finely shaped beards if he does not like to be clean shaven. To be a classy man, one has to always wear well washed and neatly ironed clothes and well polished shoes on a very clean body which means bathing at least twice every day. Hygiene also means exercise so the classy man is that man who regularly exercises his body to stay fit and healthy. Basically, the classy man caters to his teeth, mouth and tongue, bodily and facial hairs, wears clean and well pressed clothes – and regularly exercises.
13. A classy man takes his passions seriously.
A classy man sets personal goals and targets and he is focused on achieving them within reasonable periods utilizing the resources available to him. This means that a classy man, after all said and done, is a goal getter, a man who has prioritizes in his relationships, education, profession and career and every day he works towards their attainment. It is for this reason that he is not a man that neither brags about his accomplishments nor whines about his problems but he is diligent, dedicated, committed and steadfast towards the actualization of his passions per time and available resources. This means that a classy man is a successful man.
Conclusion
I am sure there are many other qualities that make for a classy man but these 13 are the Holy Grail. As a man, if you do not tick at least 8 of the 13, you have to start working on yourself as soon as yesterday. And I need not tell you that there are immeasurable benefits and privileges attached to being a classy man.
